At Work: Employee Holds Grudges Instead of Talking It Out

Lindsey Novak Q: I have been working in the same job for eight years. Last year, I overheard my supervisor tell her boss about me messing up some forms. Since then, I do what she tells me, but I ignore her. I should have known I couldn't trust her because she has told me things about other employees. She hired another woman, who talks about her husband and family life, and I don't care about it or want to hear it. So now I am ignoring both this new girl and my supervisor. I know they think I am anti-social, but I just want to come to work, do my job and go home. What do you think?

A: Calling you anti-social is extreme, but it sounds as if you have interpersonal communication problems. Socially rejecting people who upset you is an emotionally immature way of dealing with your feelings. First, your boss has the right to complain to her boss about mistakes in your work, though she should have done it in private. The question is whether she explained your mistakes to you and gave you a chance to correct them. Everyone makes occasional mistakes; it becomes a problem when the mistakes are costly or so often that it affects the overall performance quality. When your boss points out mistakes, you should show concern and say that you'll be more careful. Ignoring your boss is political suicide. People like to work with pleasant people, and your boss has the right to fire you if you show anger at having your work corrected. As for your new co-worker, politely tell her that you feel uncomfortable hearing such personal information because you are not a close friend. It's also not too late to start smiling and greeting people at work. You may find that it makes you happier, as well as those around you.

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Recruiter's Mistake Threatens Employee's Career

Q: I experienced something no one should go through. A recruiter saw my resume posted and forwarded it to my manager with a note that stated, "I came across this resume (recently). Let me know if you need a replacement." The recruiter never called me. The next day, the controller and the president questioned my stay with the company. This has jeopardized my career here. I contacted the recruiter's branch manager, who expressed her regrets but said the person was a top producer, and she excused his behavior. I think he should be fired for violating company ethics. Word spread about what happened to me, and other employees who had posted their resumes removed them or made them private, hindering their chances for other opportunities. How should I proceed?

A: Numerous people who like their jobs post resumes on job boards to keep abreast of other opportunities. It's interesting that these two executives don't realize that and expect total loyalty in a day when companies are not loyal. Talk to them about this common practice, but also tell them everything you love about the company and your job. If you cannot convince them -- and feel their trust in you has changed and hurt your future -- meet with an attorney about a possible lawsuit against the recruiter and his company. That will put a stop to this recruiter making such stupid and damaging mistakes.

source..www.arcamax.com

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